Okay, I’m not exactly going to tell you to “stop thinking of yourself as short” and leave it at that. No way. There’s much more to this story. Let’s talk about what women want from men for a second. You’ve heard that confidence attracts, and you’ve heard correctly.
As we’ve found out already, there are no “universal truths”, but this one comes about as close as possible to hitting that mark. So when you are insecure about anything, it’s a strike against you when attracting women.
Naturally, then, if all you can think about is your height “disadvantage” when approaching a taller woman, your issue is going to morph into a full-blown self-fulfilling prophesy.
The mind-blowing part is that a taller woman may indeed be likely to reject you at that point. And yes…it will be because you are shorter than she is. But there’s a crucial nuance to understand here: The rejection won’t be because you are shorter. Rather, it will be because you are insecure about being shorter.
It’s importance to see the difference here. Remember, the taller woman is probably not hung-up on height. When you are confident in yourself and comfortable in your own skin, height is far less likely to even be perceived as an issue.
Now here’s where some true magic can occur. Just because height may not be a woman’s sticking point doesn’t mean she’s without any insecurities at all. Far from it.
In fact, the more beautiful a woman is, the more likely it seems that she’ll have deepseated insecurities. This is likely because she has been pushed and cajoled to an everhigher standard of physical attractiveness all her life.
And the fact is, most of her insecurities would seem highly irrational to you.
Sound familiar?
You bet it does.
Now, let’s build upon this concept by introducing another important truth. It’s true that most guys tend to believe that women are the “choosers” and men are the “chasers”. I hear complaints from men that “attractive women can get any man they want, while we’re left to face rejection” or “women only have to wait around to be asked out, and we have to take all the risk and do all the work.”
Well, what if I told you that I receive e-mails from women all the time who view the world quite differently. In other words, their point of view suggests that men hold the cards and they are left to wait by the phone wondering if he’ll ever call. Or, they go out with a man and have a great time only to be left unsure if he’s ever going to make plans with them again.
In actuality, the one who is in control of his or her dating life is the “chooser”. He or she with the options calls the shots. Portraying yourself as a man who has options when it comes to the women you could potentially choose is a natural outflowing from a genuine sense of self-confidence.
Every approach to a woman is no longer viewed as a “make it or break it” moment. But there’s something more significant that happens as your ability to control your own destiny is recognized by a woman you are communicating with. Your attitude begins to have a positive effect on her. She begins to realize that you are a man who makes his own choices. And she likes it.
As women are often drawn to confidence, they are also often wildly attracted to a man who has strong leadership abilities.
And by definition, through coming forward as assertive enough to choose her, you’ve demonstrated to her exactly the kind of leadership traits that she admires most.
So how about it? Can you be a man who is comfortable in his own skin, doing away with insecurities about height differences?
Do you have the strength to parlay that comfort with self into sheer confidence?
From there, will you boldly accept your leadership over the situation and pronounce yourself a “chooser”? Hopefully the exercises on gaining new perspectives that I’ve shared with you thus far have been valuable in helping you get there. If so, fantastic.
Now, it’s time to take all of that even one step further and be even more of a leader in the sense that you are going to now impart your ability to stand confidently and securely to her. Don’t get me wrong. To be perfectly clear, this isn’t about showering her with empty compliments like countless other guys who are only manipulating her because they want something.
Rather, what this is about is empowering her with an attitude that you appreciate her as she is and—importantly—that you will not tolerate any self-loathing behavior on her part. You reward her for being confident, and speak up when she speaks poorly of herself. Even if meeting her for the first time, you can project confidence as you introduce yourself to her and then simply lead a conversation that allows her to do most of the talking.
Listen carefully for any indication that she’s insecure about anything at all. At that point, firmly but considerately share with her that you believe the rest of the world doesn’t see the negative that she sees. In other words, you can talk to her about exactly what we’ve covered in this report.
At that point your re-framing of how you view yourself and your perception of how women view you has come full circle. By leading the woman into a place where she is empowered to let go of her insecurities, you will have affected her in a way that is irresistibly attractive to women. You will have first shown confidence, then leadership.
What’s more, since your words are genuine, she’ll begin to develop trust for you. At that point she won’t help but view you positively. Quite literally, she will have anchored a better feeling about herself to the feelings you give her when you are around.
Once you get to that level, it seems almost foolish to even think about reverting to selfconsciousness about your own height, doesn’t it?
And indeed, over the course of a hopefully brief amount of time, and with some practice, you will see dramatic results and will thereby eliminate your limiting beliefs about dating taller women forever.
Continue reading What Taller Women Will Respond Powerfully To